James Bond, that is.

Remember, you heard it there first.

If you’re going to wait a month and a half in line to see Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith, make sure you’re in line at a theater that is actually going to show it, okay?

My worst nightmare.

Ming Kuang Chen, 35, had been the subject of a widespread search after he failed to return to his restaurant Friday with $200 in receipts.

Firefighters were called to the apartment complex early Tuesday after getting a complaint that someone was stuck in the elevator.

“They said, ‘We think the guy’s drunk. We can’t understand him,’” fire Lt. Peter Chadwick told The New York Times. “Little did they know he wasn’t drunk, but probably feeling the effects of being in an elevator” for days.

Chen was suffering from dehydration, said Dr. Babak Toosi at Montefiore Medical Center, but was feeling better after eating an apple, cereal and a roll.

If I had to choose what elevator to be stuck in for four days, it might be okay. But some elevators are so god damn tiny …

Forty years in jail because he was pissed that he had to change the name of his white-supremacy organization. Jesus Christ, man, spend ten bucks, change the logo, now you’re going to be Bubba’s bitch until 2045! I hope it was worth it.

I had lunch at Molly’s! And I met Molly! She’s just as eccentric as her blog would leave you to believe. (She did confess to me that she had no bartending experience, but she was cleanin’, smokin’, drinkin’ - not beer - and talkin’ up a storm all at the same time, and doesn’t that include all the trades of a bartender right there?)

Quite a bit of discussion about buying a house, and where in Baltimore it would be good for me to move. Discussion of credit report, credit score, and what I needed to get done.

Of course, twenty minutes later, I’m all, “Shit! I have about a hundred questions I forgot to ask!” But that makes a convenient excuse to go back another day and have another absolutely delicious piece of cheese toast.

Walked up to the door with a pizza bag and rang the doorbell. It was one of those musical doorbells - I don’t know the tune, but it was a Christmas tune. I found myself whistling along. Then the tune stopped. So without thinking of what I was doing - nevermind that the woman had just opened the door and was saying “Hi, how are you?” - I rang the doorbell again.

Then I felt silly.

Thankfully, the lady had a sense of humor. “I’m glad someone enjoys our doorbell!”

(I sort of gather the family bought it as a gag and tired of it.)

And really, who the fuck gives a hoot?

But, who the fuck is Stephen Tobolowsky?

I have a sneaky feeling that ACW might know who Stephen Tobolowsky is, but if you don’t, click here, then head over to his IMDB.com datebase.

I really think I’m a whore.

A blog whore, that is.

Fed-tax done (online tax payment! joy!), and my Discover card bill is now $400+ higher.

And I need to buy sneakers tomorrow - er, today.

Apparently, she was so desperate for five reasons to hate the “liberal” media for its reactions to the Pope’s death that reason #2 is, drumroll please, “CBS puts a basketball game over the death of one of modern history’s most towering figures.”

Because, apparently, all the media attention the Pope’s death has already recieved just hasn’t been enough. I mean, dammit, why are all these news stations airing commercials when they could be reminding us, “Hey, the Pope died. Did you hear?”

Also, radio stations should stop playing music and the DJs should talk about the Pope and the ramifications of his magnificent life. This should continue until we all know the Pope has died.

Wait. The Pope died? When? This wasn’t on ANY of the TV news stations, I swear, they were all talking about basketball.

Oh! Also, a map of the Vatican I had but had no reason to post. This is as good a reason as any, right?

I will more than likely be having lunch here. However, I don’t like shrimp, and the only way to get me to eat pizza on my day off usually involves a handgun, so maybe I’ll just stick to a cold glass of beer.

Interesting tidbit in USA Today.

In the survey, most Americans disapprove of the efforts by President Bush and Congress to draw federal courts into the dispute over treatment of the brain-damaged Florida woman. She died last week.

Some old stereotypes about the two parties have been reversed:

• By 55%-40%, respondents say Republicans, traditionally the party of limited government, are “trying to use the federal government to interfere with the private lives of most Americans” on moral values.

• By 53%-40%, they say Democrats, who sharply expanded government since the Depression, aren’t trying to interfere on moral issues.

Just goes to show - there ain’t no room in the “new GOP” for “small government” folks anymore.