The Interpreter

Ok, the climax, where the assassin is prepared to take his shot from the sound room overlooking the UN’s big room? Reminded me so much of Star Trek VI, where the assassin is prepared to take his shot … from a sound room overlooking a similar looking room. The only thing missing was Sean Penn tackling the would-be-assassinated dude and then introducing himself as, “Kirk, Enterprise.”

The movie as a whole was dissapointing - Sean Penn? Ick. There was an attempt to build a mystery or suspense and frankly I found neither compelling. Catherine Keener had far too small of a role, and I often had the thought that the plot was consistently setting up plot points and then ignoring them. Waaaay too preachy of a film.

I’m really upset by how all the movie’s media describes Sean Penn’s character as an FBI Agent when in fact he’s Secret Service. What, that agency too Gestapo sounding for the Netflix envelope?

Crash

Tries to be Robert Altman with a social conscience on the relationship between the races in L.A. (not done as well as it might have been if Altman was doing it). Storytelling takes a backseat to preaching and its hard to get past the film without thinking that most of the dynamic characters you’d actually like to see more of get supremely short changed.

Gunner Palace

The best of my current batch of Netflix selections — follows a group of U.S. Infantrymen living in one of Saddam’s kids’ bombed-out palaces. Highly reccomend watching it, regardless of your opinion on the war — it doesn’t “put you right in the middle of it”, but it gets you close to what those people experience over there.

You scored as Batman, the Dark Knight. As the Dark Knight of Gotham, Batman is a vigilante who deals out his own brand of justice to the criminals and corrupt of the city. He follows his own code and is often misunderstood. He has few friends or allies, but finds comfort in his cause. Batman, the Dark Knight 96% Indiana Jones 75% The Amazing Spider-Man 67% Neo, the "One" 63% Captain Jack Sparrow 54% William Wallace 54% Maximus 50% The Terminator 50% Lara Croft 46% James Bond, Agent 007 42% El Zorro 17%

Which Action Hero Would You Be? v. 2.0
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Debateable, “truest mystery” probably better descriptor, but if you’re familiar with the true story of King Richard III, you owe Josephine Tey’s Daughter of Time a read. True? Not so much, perhaps?

Yesterday and the previous Sunday were both crap as far as business went.

As tips go, I’m doing okay. I worked a little over seven hours yesterday and made about eighty-bucks on fifteen deliveries — not bad at all. Of course, previous Sundays (not counting last week, which also sucked) my total take got as high as $130, and never under $100 since the start of the football season. I also took waaaay more than twenty deliveries each night.

I blame two factors: first, pulling the clocks back an hour brings darkness at about five, which means the dinner rush occurs earlier. The earlier the dinner rush, the earlier it ends and the longer period of time at night can be classified ’slow.’

And, frankly, I don’t think The Ravens’ piss poor playing has done much to boost my tip earnings. Thanks guys. Since you fuckers make millions of bucks, and that doesn’t seem to motivate you much, hows about you start playing better so I can pay my bills on time, okay fuckers?

When drinking, it should be obvious to most people that with their senses dulled by alcohol, they should operate not a motor vehicle, nor heavy equipment, nor weapons. Even — perhaps, especially? — untraditional weapons.

I hate running into the stores’ “regular” customers while out shopping. Ran into the guy who owns 3004 MadeUp Mill Lane at Target Saturday morning. I said “hello” … and he continued right past me. He probably only recognizes me because of my car and the stupid uniform, so I don’t mind so much the lack of a response — if a random person said “hello” to you, would you be unstartled enough to reply back?

And for me, it’s also a question of, “If I don’t say anything but wait for him or her to greet me, don’t I come across as a jerk?”

Then again, we were across the aisle from each other.

Me, stupid! Stupid!

There was a time when time did not “fly by.” There was a time when the weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas took years to pass, and the hours between going to bed Christmas Eve and waking up Christmas Morning took DAYS.

(Not literally, I trust you understand I’m speaking in, oh, what’s the word and where’s a dictionary when you really need one?)

I used to be one of those people who made fun of stores that put up their Christmas decorations before Halloween and Thanksgiving. I still don’t like seeing those decorations before Halloween, but I’ve loosened my stance on Thanksgiving. Personally, months seem to go by in weeks now. August seems like it was last week.

In addition to thinking about Christmas presents — I’ve already started (I’ve turned into one of those people) — my thoughts have also turned to Christmas movies.

No, not the traditional ones, my Christmas movies, the movies I watch at Christmas time because they remind me, for whatever twisted reason, of the holiday.

In no fixed order:

The American President
Casablanca
Shaun of the Dead

I couldn’t, I think, explain to anyone why these movies remind me of Christmas, but they do. Besides, the only actual Christmas-themed movie I can watch without barfing is National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation , but I don’t own a copy.

If I had to justify my picks … I first watched The American President when I worked at Blockbuster. It was snowing when I watched it, and December. There was a Christmas scene. As for Casablanca, oh come on, how much more Christmas-y can you get than a dead Nazi? As for Shaun of the Dead, a zombie film as a Christmas film? Sure, ever been to the mall in December? It’s full of ‘em! And who wouldn’t like to take a cricket bat to their heads?

Me!

I mean, “Me, I’d like to take a cricket bat to their heads”, not “Me! I’d not like to take a cricket bat to their heads.” (Because, oh, I so would).

(It isn’t murder to kill a zombie, is it? Jail time for public disturbance or something? ‘You’re charged with leaving zombie corpses in public.’ Dammit)

Baltimore Bloggers’ Happy Hour this Wednesday at Molly’s, hosted by this dude and his wife.

I’ve got a ride.

I’m getting drunk.

I’m going to drunkenly hug many people.

Then I’m going to yak all over Neckbone’s Jeep.

My night, it be planned.

UPDATE:
(Actually, forgot-to-put-in-original-post-date)

I’ve got it on good authority that a non-Baltimore-area blogger will be attending, you should go to her blog and blog hello.

If you’re interested in going to see Harry Potter on Nov. 18th, please e-mail me by Monday evening so I can pick up advanced tickets on Tuesday morning.

If you make the commitment, please don’t then not show up, because obviously I’m going to be paying for these tickets out of my own cash and I don’t want to buy tickets you ain’t gonna use.

There’s this commercial airing on the radio. Three voices - two guys and a girl. They’re trying to emulate a morning show’s banter to build buzz for whatever NBC programs are airing that night. It was amusing the first time, I’ll admit — I had to stop and think, “Wait, what station is this? Who are these people?” Now it’s just getting old, plus it doesn’t help that they sound like the most boring, unhip, no life white people ever. (Well, uh, besides me).

Anyway, the commercials tend to go something like this:

Guy 1: “So, uh, what are YOU doing tonight?”

Girl: “I’m staying in and watching TV! NBC.”

Guy 2: “Please continue with the obvious plug!”

Guy 1: “Please tell, what’s so good on NBC tonight?”

Guy 2: “Oh, well, according to the script, there’s the show ‘Medium’, and ‘Law & Order: Manhattan.’”

Guy 1: “Oh, like the new Law and Order is great, isn’t there a digital representation of Jerry Orbach in the cast?”

Girl: “Yes, and on ‘Medium’ it’s the best supernatural show on television ever.”

Guy 2: “Oh, and what’s the show about the water? I’ve never seen that one.”

Girl: “OMG. Like, it’s grrrrreat! It’s called Surface…”

Guy 2: “Like, yeah, with the monsters? That’s so much better than that show with the island on the rival network.”

Guy 1: “Yeah, like, Surface is great, not a rip-off at all, because it has monsters.”

Girl: “OMG. The monsters are grrrreat! I bet they have big monster penises.”

Guy 2: “…and monster vaginas, hah. I made a funny.”

Girl: “I want to have sex with the surface monsters with the giant penises!!”

Ok, I take it back, they don’t go anything like this … but I think the spots would be better if they did. Plus, NBC could tag the commercials with, “…To See Dumb Radio Girl Have Sex With the Monsters, Tune in to Must-See TV Tonight … only on NBC!”

I’d watch but, uh, I’ll be at work.

Many months ago ACW threw a house-warming party and I went, tortured his cat, and got a look at his dining room. Perhaps coincidentally, the color green he and ACWF had chosen for the room was the same shade of green of his at the time current Blogspot blog. When she arrived, Zenchick pointed this out and couldn’t stop laughing.

Flash forward to a few weeks ago. Zenchick and I meet at her apartment before heading to Hampden to meet Broadsheet for lunch. I clear my throat, remind her about her comments regarding ACW’s dining room, then inquire if she’s aware her wall is the exact same color as her own blog?

I’ve been meaning to write this post for awhile, but since ACW went and bought his own domain, I thought now was probably preferable to later.

Also, brief congratulations due to both ACW and Fool for getting Grown Up Blogs of their very own. Yes, congratulations on forcing me to waste valuable post writing time to update my blogrolls with your new web addresses. [NapoleanDynamite]God![/NapoleanDynamite] (That goes for her, too). [NapoleanDynamite]Double God![/NapoleanDynamite]

Update:

also, congrats to Jason J. Thomas on his new domain!

I didn’t post Saturday or Sunday? I’m such a slacking blog-whore.