I look forward to today’s holiday every year. It’s that time of the year to renew, replenish, and delete the mistakes of the previous twelve months. In this case, it’s also an opportunity to start doing right by my fourth New Year’s Resolution — can’t remember which one that was? There’s a search feature to the right of these words.

That’s right, today is the holiday known as “Spring Cleaning Day.” Yeah, I know, there’s another holiday that somehow associates rabbits and chocolate with the resurrection of Jesus Christ and the message that eternal life is to be had, but if it’s true that there are only two types of Catholic, I’m solidly in the “fallen” category. You ask me, this Christian habit of associating their holidays with giant bunny rabbits and old dudes with long white beards tends to dilute the holiness that is supposed to be associated with holy holidays.

In any case, today, for me, is “Spring Cleaning Day”, and I am up bright and early to get a running start at it. That’s right, as I type, it is not even eight am (I might, under pressure, admit that I’ve gone to bed at midnight every night this week and just woke up, thus getting close to eight hours of sleep and I feel well rested).

By the end of the day, my bedroom, my bathroom, my kitchen, and my dining and living rooms will sparkle with clean shelves, freshly vaccumed floors, neatly organized rows of books, DVDs, and collectibles, the kitchen floor shall be so shiny the cats will slide across it, the bathroom tiles will be scrubbed clear of the ground-in cat litter, and the entire apartment will carry the slight pungent odor of bleach and other assorted cleaning detergents. The blinds will be up, the windows open, and my felines will be able to watch my progress as they alternate between scopin’ out the prey running around just outside the windows, and running and hiding whenever I turn on the vaccum cleaner.

Also on the list — laundry! Errands out to return Neckbone’s keys and offer myself up as his bitch to make good on this, as well as a run to Target to stock up on some cleaning supplies I believe I will run out, and possibly I will spend a chunk of today cleaning my car as well — not just the interior, either, nope, I might actually, as the New Guy K. told me I should do, “show her some love” (i.e., take her to the car wash).

Well, I got me some cleaning to do.