This is fucking awesome.

HT: RTftLC.

Deadwood canceled?

I’ve rewritten the following paragraph to keep with the language used on the show. The original is here, the Deadwood version follows below:

The cocksucking pay cable network has cocksuckingly opted not to pick up the cocksucking options of the cocksucking actors on the cocksucking show, cocksuckingly releasing them to cocksuckingly pursue other cocksucking projects.

Cocksucking “Deadwood” creator, cocksucker David cocksucking Milch is shifting his cockknocking attention to “cocksucking John From cocksucker Cincinnati,” a cocksucking one-hour project he is writing for the cocksuckers at HBO. The cocksucking surfing-themed cocksucking drama has been ordered as a cockfucked pilot, subject to finalizing cocksucking deals on the cocksucking financial and cocksucking talent side.

Cocksucking HBO sources said there are conversations about the cockfucked future of cocksucking “Deadwood” beyond the cocksucking third season, which cockfuckingly premieres June 11. But with the cockwhore actors moving on to other cocksucking commitments, it is highly cocksuckingly unlikely that all the cocksucking main cast members would be available to do cockfucked additional episodes in the cockfucking future.

Seriously, you think I wrote “cocksucking” a lot? Watch the show. I went light.

The Immortal Class is one of the most fascinating non-fiction books I’ve read in the past few years. Travis Culley bounced around from pointless job to pointless job in Chicago before he began working as a bicycle courier. In addition to talking about the ins and outs of a courier job, Culley discusses the notion of roads belonging to automobiles, and combating that mindset. At the end of the book, he talks about the death of a bicycle courier named Tommy McBride, who was run over by a jackfuck named Carnell Fitzpatrick, who turned himself in only when he realized his front license plate had torn loose and was twisted in the bloody remains of McBride and his bike. (Fitzpatrick was convicted of first degree murder).

Anyway, reading this article about the hit-and-run death of a bicycler in Howard County (thanks, Epistolary!) reminded me of this, so I thought I’d share. This was my good deed of the week.

You know those people who pull through a parking space so they can be pointed out of the next one? The people who do that as opposed to, say, shifting into reverse and twisting around in their seat and performing the manuever known as “backing up”?

Anyway, I was at Target, and I saw this lady start to pull her SUV into a spot, and, figuring that she was trying to pull herself all the way through … I pulled my Celica into that spot.

Sure enough, she had this “…?” expression on her face, and I was like, “What? I wanted a spot, too.”

Hah. I’m such an ass.

(I will, on occasion, pull through a spot as opposed to backing up).

Pipeline explodes in Nigeria.

I’m glad I gassed up last night.

(Also, it’s really sad about all the dead people).