I don’t even know if I could write an entire sentence in cursive.

I was working closing at the Indy last night. My final run turned out to be to Highland Ridge, and I came back to the store on Paper Mill Road. As Paper Mills goes through Hunter’s Run, it expands from two lanes to five lanes: two each in both directions, and a middle turning lane.

I had been being tailed by some jackass. Shortly after passing the NCR trail, I first saw him in my rear view mirror, and he gunned it to tailgate me until the road widened, at which point he cut around to my left (as opposed to using the unoccupied right-lane). He didn’t just pass me in the center lane, he was going so fast and reckless, he passed me from the east-bound traffic’s left-lane. Thankfully, there was no east-bound traffic, but I did get a good luck at this fuckwadastic’s license plate when he cut back over in front of me: JHU1157.

Which just goes to show that if you’re going to drive like a ‘tard, don’t piss off the blogger who has no problem posting your license plate to the internet in the hope that local police officers will read about your mornicness and keep their eyes peeled for you so that they can write you hundreds of dollars in stupid-driving tickets.

JHU1157, if you happen to get an e-mail from someone at John’s Hopkins alerting you that a trackback to the school’s website revealed an alumni being a fuckwad, and you read this post: you are reckless, careless, and a danger to yourself and your fellow drivers. Were you drunk? Remind me not to cry when you wreck your car.

Well. Now that I’ve got that off my chest …