Actually, that title is wrong — Tristan is the one who sucks. Or, rather, James Franco, who plays Tristan in last year’s Tristan and Isolde, sucks. I don’t even know how to begin describing how awful the film was, so I’ll just say that I let it run for about forty minutes, was bored to tears (even during what were supposed to be exciting battle scenes that instead seemed stolen from Kevin Reynold’s other medieval film, Robin Hood Prince of Thieves, yeah, no coincidence there) and turned it off.

Somebody needs to help James Franco pick good movies to be in. Yeah, sure, great, he’s in the Spiderman films - yeah, well, James, people don’t go to those to see your pretty little face. Everything I’ve seen you in? Either sucks or look like it should suck: The Great Raid, Flyboys, Annapolis. C’mon, James. Let’s try to diversify, instead of going for the paychecks. Quality, quantity, y’know, I’m sure you can figure it all out …

Other Capsul Reviews:

I loved Terrence Malick’s The Thin Red Line, about US Army troops advancing through Guadalcanal during WWII. I didn’t feel the same way about The New World. The Thin Red Line was beautiful and moving and, at times, breathlessly violent, yet, there was this interconnection of beauty and war that tied everything together. The New World was just, to my mind, a total mess. A beautiful mess, don’t get me wrong, and I felt very relaxed when it ended, but I’d rather never put myself through that film again.

Flirting With Disaster was, at times, painfully funny with a rather sadistic twist. Is it just me or was Tea Leoni hotter in Bad Boys?

I’m letting this speak for itself; I do think my grade could’ve been higher, the Prof was perhaps a little misleading on what would be on the final (in my opinion). Don’t get me wrong - I’m thrilled with my grade and I’m going to do the Dance of Joy!

What a great time was had by all who attended. All of you who didn’t show are clearly losers. And by losers I mean “clearly you have a life that does not 100% revolve around the internet and should be congratulated on fearing the internet.”

The attendees (in no particular alphabetical order):

Ancestral Pile
Anger Hangover
Anonymous Coworker
Bags in Trees
Baltimore Diary
Baltimore Mick
Box89E
Broadsheet
Double Dogged
Fruit Loops & Porn
You Are Not Your iPodHolyBuckFatman
Jennetic
jomiwi!
JWER
Live From Bawlmer
Malnurtured Snay (me!)
Messy Hair Girl
So, As I Was Saying
Your Neighborhood Librarian
Zenchick

I’m pretty sure this is a comprehensive list, but should I have happened to neglect someone, please chalk that up to my drinking and full night of restful but brain erasing sleep. I’m off to drop my car off at the shop before work so I need to run, but I will come back and hyperlink all of the above later today *update*: hyperlinked!

Most - if not all - of these blogs can be found on my blogroll (the Baltimore/Maryland section), and any not there can be located on Blogtimore.