Before you read this post, I want you to ponder this inquiry: who is the most influential, best known, and most prolific writer of the English language?
Last week, I had to turn in the rough draft of my paper for my Tuesday night “Tradition and Form” class. We had an option to write a literary analysis comparing several of the short stories we’d read, or we could write our own short story. This is sort of like the choice between eating a kidney or a cheeseburger — given the choice, I know what I like, and given the choice, I prefer to play to my strengths, and while I know I can write a literary analysis as well as anyone else in the class, I decided to write a short story.
I knew I was going to have to turn the short story in several weeks in advance, but I really didn’t do any work on it until the day it was due. Arrived at campus 7:30am that day and wrote my ass off. I even skipped my 11am ItCM class, and by the time T&F began at 3:30 that afternoon, the story had been spell-checked, 1.5 spaced, and printed. I have this little green stapler I carry in my backpack and I stapled the ten sheets together just as Dr. A walked into the room.
At the end of class came an unwelcome announcement – we’d have another week to work on the assignment before handing in our rough draft. I didn’t say anything, and took advantage of the opportunity to hand mine in anyway, but it bothered me: why bother having a due-date if you’re just going to extend it? I mean, look, I know I was wrong to procrastinate that long before starting the assignment (although I work much better on such assignments with a deadline), but when I skip a class to get something done, it’d be nice if it was actually worth it.
So skip forward a week to last night. Everyone turned in their stories, and the second half of the class was dedicated to discussing these rough drafts. Dr. A read sections of each story – last night, due to time limitations, we only had the opportunity to discuss four of the stories – a difficult job being able only to comment on the parts read to us by Dr. A. It’s like a bastardized version of a writing class, but from what little information we got we, as a class, were able to offer some limited advice.
Dr. A discussed my story first, probably because I’d turned it in so early. Y’know what, for all my earlier griping, I take it back – ever turn in a rough draft and get told you don’t need to turn in a final? Well, part of that is probably because I usually just write a final draft, which is what I did in this case. Anyway, I’m still going to make some final edits, but it’s nice to know I’ve got a hurdle done for this class.
And aren’t you happy to know I haven’t even started talking about the point of this post? Hah.
So, during the break, I wind up outside of Linthicum Hall talking with a couple of guys from the class. One of ‘em mentions Hot Fuzz, said it was great, I told him that I was going to see it that night and I did and it was great.
Anyway, the other guy spoke up – TV is crap, movies are crap, books are where it’s at. He made a very persuasive argument, and of course, as a fan of books and reading, I found myself sympathetic to his points … but not convinced. A big point of his argument was that movies and television are written purely for entertainment purposes, whereas works of literature “explore the human experience.” Sure, books force a person to imagine and picture and people get more out of them than perhaps they do with television shows …
… but what are television and movies if not a high-tech theater productions?
And who is known as the greatest writer of the English language of all time?
William Shakespeare.
And he wrote to put money in his pocket. He wrote to entertain, because if he entertained, he’d make money. And despite all that, it’s impossible not to read his works and catch a glimpse of something greater.
And it’s thus hard to reach the conclusion that television or movies don’t have that same literary possibility. I certainly don’t mean to suggest that some crap B movie can have as much literary value as, say, Richard II, but some television, some very very small percentage of television shows, and of movies, can indeed be insightful and great and yes, entertaining too, even if maybe they do over-rely on moving images and moving musical scores.
Also: happy belated birth-and-death day, Billy Shakespeare.
When people ask me if I believe in life up there, y’know, among the stars, I think to the film Contact, and a line from David Morse. I paraphrase here, “If there isn’t other life, up there, it’d be an awful waste of space.” So I got a little excited about a BBC News article I read last night:
Astronomers have found the most Earth-like planet outside our Solar System to date, a world which could have water running on its surface.
Scientists made the discovery using the Eso 3.6m Telescope in Chile.
They say the benign temperatures on the planet mean any water there could exist in liquid form, and this raises the chances it could also harbour life.
“We have estimated that the mean temperature of this ‘super-Earth’ lies between 0 and 40 degrees Celsius, and water would thus be liquid,” explained Stephane Udry of the Geneva Observatory, lead author of the scientific paper reporting the result.
It’s one of those things I never thought I’d write. All of the times I thought I might find myself writing this sentence, I said to myself, “Tosh, Jeff, you’re being silly.” And yet, I cannot escape the conclusion that I have reached. I must ask you, please, when you read what I have to say, that you consider my judgement sound and my taste solid.
Ready?
Hot Fuzz is, on every level, better than Shaun of the Dead.
I know, I was surprised too. Pleasantly, of course — it can’t be a bad thing to have your expectations blown away. Would this be a good time to go ahead and mention that the remainder of this post might or might not contain spoilers for the film? Consider yourself warned, anyway, because, yes, it does.
(Yes, it does contain spoilers, I mean).
Wow. What a great and wonderous film. It’s like they took all the good stuff of Shaun of the Dead, quadrupled it, then smashed it all into a movie that is, despite not being about zombies, much gorier. I found myself on the edge of the seat for most of the film, laughing, guffawing, and having a great time. There are things about the film I didn’t get — half a dozen blokes going ape on a sneezeguard with machine guns and shotguns can’t smash it, but a train of grocery carts shatters it into thousands of pieces? — but there were things I thought touching: like the fact that Danny’s flat is a wreck … except for his clean and tighty DVD closet. Score!
I’d really like to go see this film again before it is out of theaters. Did I mention it was laugh out loud funny? Well, it was.
That’s the headline of an editorial by Jennifer Baker in the Towerlight this week.
I’ve never been so disappointed in Towson University as I was this past week. I’ve always known that Towson has been a school lacking in school spirit. However, I never would have imagined the lack of caring this past Friday.
Virginia Tech alumni and students declared this past Friday “Maroon and Orange Affect Day” – a day were students were supposed to wear maroon and orange to show their support for those attempting to deal with the tragedy that happened at Tech. As I looked out my window, maybe one out of every 30 students was wearing maroon and orange. The faculty that I saw seemed to be wearing every other color of the rainbow.
Especially given the fact that this past Friday was also Destination Towson, you would think that the University would have made a larger deal out of showing that this school cares about the events that occurred. No such luck. Even the chairs of the academic departments were lacking support.
As I sat down last Monday watching the events unfold and talking to my friend at Tech, I was worried that students at Towson would let this go unnoticed. These fears were diminished when I heard that The Towerlight was going to have very thorough coverage. But with limited circulation, the efforts they put in were cut short. I know that if I had not heard about the issue through Facebook, I would not have sought out a copy, and probably would not have received one.
Perhaps you may not understand why I am so upset about this since we are Towson students, not Virginia Tech students. But think about this: If the headlines said “Massacre at Towson,” how would you feel if no other schools wore black and gold? And yes,
this could have happened here. It could have happened anywhere.
And here, my pathetic response:
Dear Jennifer,
If the massacre happened at Towson, I really don’t think I’d care much who if anyone chose to wore black and gold on some random day chosen to show support. Then again, it might depend on whether or not I was dead. And if someone I knew or cared about had died in this hypothetical massacre at Towson, I don’t know that seeing people wearing Towson’s school colors would really matter a great deal to me one way or the other.
I wasn’t on campus Friday, so I don’t know how many people weren’t wearing VTech’s colors. I worked. And I didn’t wear maroon and orange. I don’t have many clothes in those colors (maroon means red, right?), but just because I wasn’t wearing my heart on my sleeve (proverbially or literally as you will) doesn’t mean I haven’t been thinking about it, or thinking about the possibility it might happen someday on Towson’s campus, or how such random violence could, possibly, in the future, affect my life.
No, Jennifer, it doesn’t. What’s the saying? Judge a person by their actions and not their words? In this case, you have to judge a person not by their actions (not wearing VTech colors) but by their heart. I realize you’re probably not psychic, and probably can’t look into people’s hearts, but from my experiences on campus last week, a lot of people have VTech on their minds, and in their hearts.
Does it surprise you that the outward acknowledgement of the massacre might be lacking? For all our bluster and jokes about the massacre in my classes, all of this masked a deep worry that such a tragedy might someday come to Towson — after all, we’re on a college campus not much better protected than VTech’s was. Don’t think the thought isn’t running through everyone’s mind on campus: could this happen to us? As you point out, of course it could. Do you really expect people to drag this out of the deep dark closets of our inner-psyches and display it for everyone to see? Doubtful.
Your personality type is dreamy, romantic, elegant, and expressive.
Only about 5% of all people have your personality, including 6% of all women and 4% of all men
You are Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, and Perceiving.
Answer: Probably the same place the white community’s collective guilt was.
Backstory: On the Ed Norris show today, a caller called in and remarked on the collective guilt the Korean-American community feels over the VTech massacre. Then the caller inquired as to where the black collective guilt was since the “Beltway snipers” in 2002 turned out to be black.
Don’t you think it’s telling this caller didn’t remark on, say, the collective guilt of the white or Polish communities after Joe Palczynski’s murder spree? I do.
There’s an interesting article in The Guardian Unlimited about the collective guilt felt by Koreans:
The reaction to the Virginia Tech massacre in the nation where the shooter was born has been an outpouring of sympathy mixed with feelings of shame. There are also concerns that going too far in apologizing would make it appear South Korea is unjustifiably taking some blame for the killings.
Expressions of regret have ranged from candlelight vigils and religious services to online tributes. South Korea’s ambassador to the U.S. proposed the idea of Koreans living in America taking turns in a 32-day fast to honor each of the victims.
President Roh Moo-hyan has expressed condolences four times – the first before it even emerged the culprit was a South Korean immigrant, followed by words of sympathy to the American people and to President Bush.
“This is a sensitive time,” the leading Chosun Ilbo daily cautioned in an editorial. “We must ensure that our true intentions, to share the sorrow, can travel across the ocean and reach the hearts of grieving Americans.”
Seung-Hui Cho left South Korea as a boy and lived in the United States for more than 14 years, where he apparently grew into a deeply troubled young man whose murderous spree was facilitated by easy access to guns.
Much of the reaction to Cho’s nationality in his native land is colored by South Korea’s keen awareness of its national image. South Korea is obsessed with how it is perceived by the outside world, and its group-oriented culture means the achievements of the few are marshaled into rallying cries for the many.
“Koreans think very much in terms of national identity rather than individual identity,” said Michael Breen, author of the book “The Koreans: Who They Are, What They Want, Where Their Future Lies.”
South Koreans are quick to take group credit even from afar. The most notable recent example is Pittsburgh Steelers’ wide receiver Hines Ward, the offspring of an African-American father and Korean mother, who was feted as a national hero after he was named Most Valuable Player in the 2006 Super Bowl – even though he and American football were virtually unknown here before.
But collective guilt is a Korean concept, not an American one. First and second generation Korean immigrants to America still feel that pull, but those of Korean descent who have been here longer don’t. The Baltimore Sun elaborates:
Kyeyoung Park, an associate professor of anthropology at the University of California Los Angeles and member at the university’s Center for Korean Studies, said that because Korean culture tends to be homogeneous, new immigrants rely on one another emotionally.
“In Western culture there is an emphasis on guilt; in many Eastern cultures the emphasis is on shame,” she said. “I think Korean-Americans want to do something because they feel ashamed. Some of them feel truly responsible, even though it is ridiculous to think they are responsible for the action of this person.”
Park said some first-generation immigrants identified with the comments of South Korean Ambassador Lee Tae-sik, who said not only do Korean-Americans feel ashamed but called for them to “repent.” He suggested a 32-day fast – one day for each victim of Monday’s carnage.
But Hong, with the Mirae Foundation, said many second- and third-generation immigrants reject that sense of culpability. Hong, who said he attended the Fairfax vigil in which Lee made the comments, was outraged by the remarks.
So, that, Anonymous Caller to the Ed Norris show, is where the black community’s collective guilt was when Malvo decided to kill a bunch of people who’d never done anything to him. It wasn’t anywhere, because it doesn’t exist. And the reason it doesn’t exist is the same reason there was no white collective guilt when Palcyznski decided to go kill a bunch of people who’d never done anything to him. It isn’t there because it isn’t a black concept, or a white concept – it’s a culture concept, and our culture rejects group guilt.
Saturday was a good — no, great — day to work. A lot of big orders and generous tippers.
But of course, not everyone can be a generous tipper, or even a good tipper, or even a moderately-okay tipper. No, this person — bitch, really — could barely tip a buck, and, gosh, apparently had no flatware to eat her salad with.
This she says to me with a straight face even though we’re at her house. What, she doesn’t have a dammed fork? Somehow, I doubt it.
I know why she didn’t have a fork. The manager Saturday morning thought to himself, “Oh, of course she’s got flatware, so by not packing a cheap plastic fork, I’ll be saving boss-man a whole nickel.” Really, it’s one of those things where I really wished he’d've checked with me first, because it wasn’t going to be his ass running back to this woman’s house with her damn stupid plastic fucking fork. And this wasn’t a short delivery — eff no, this was eight miles one way. In other words, a whole damn gallon of gas wasted making two fucking trips to her house.
And, did I mention she tipped a dollar and made it seem like she was passing a kidney stone to do so? Nevermind her big house, multiple cars and trucks and SUVs and the boat on the trailer or the pool in the backyard.
It all worked out — I got a few bucks from the store for going back up a second time, she certainly didn’t give me any financial reward for going back up to her a second time.
I can’t complain – did I mention Saturday was a great day? I wish I had more like them. Because despite “I Need My Stupid Fucking Plastic Fork” lady, tips were really so far beyond great I don’t have the words for it.
I know it’s complete and total sacrilege to hold a Baltimore Blogger Happy Hour in the county, but considering why, I think you’ll agree it’s fitting. May 17th is my last — and only — day of finals at Towson. In addition to marking the end of the spring semester, it also is marks the end of my last semester before graduation.
So – the next Baltimore Blogger Happy Hour (timed so I can celebrate graduation in the appropriate manner – gettin’ pissed!) is scheduled for:
When: Thursday, May 17th, 7:00 pm Why: Why not? Plus, I need to get pissed. Where:Crease Restaraunt & Bar
523 York Road
Towson, Maryland
Questions? Shoot an e-mail to the address here: malnurturedsnay AT gmail DOT com.
The Kaz II was found with its engine running, and a table laid for dinner, but there were no signs of any people.
Rescue crews say they are puzzled by the mysterious disappearance.
“The engine was running, the computers were running, there was a laptop set up on the table which was running, the radio was working… and there was food and utensils set on the table ready to eat,” said Jon Hall, a spokesman for Queensland’s Emergency Management office.
“It was a bit strange,” he added.
All the vessel’s sails were up, although one was badly shredded, and lifejackets were still on board.
It’s like a modern Marie Celeste. I don’t want to make bets, but I’m betting one of three things happened: they all decided to commit suicide and all did; they abandoned ship as a practical joke and will soon be found giggling and laughing; they were intercepted on the high seas and killed for their partipation in some mob-related criminal enterprise.
I’m thankful Geisha ordered food tonight from the Indy for three reasons:
1. It’s always good to see her.
2. She tips very well.
3. It gives me an opportunity to write about my near death experience that occured less than an hour ago (because I’m using her computer … it’s a slow night, the other drivers can use the money).
Making a left hand turn out of Greenpoint in May’s Chapel. Had to run Padonia out to Falls for a second delivery. Anyway, I had the green light, but Mr. Asswhacker in his SUV didn’t heed his red and, really?, I have no fucking idea how he didn’t fucking total my car and put me in the hospital.
Then he realizes his mistake, pulls over to let me pass, and waves his hand to say “I’m sorry.”
Stop running red lights and I’ll accept your apology. NOT. Shit, I probably could’ve sued you for quite a nice amount, too.
Our spelling of “Hercules” comes from the Roman spelling, but his original Greek name, literally translated as “Hera’s Reputation”, gives you an inkling of the taunting his mere existance gave to the wife Zeus cheated on to produce his son. No wonder Hera fucking hated Zeus’ bastard son.
Anyway, I’m watching Hercules right now – the 1997 Disney Movie. Why? Not for fun, certainly. Actually, it’s for an assignment in ItCM. I’ve got a short-paper due on Tuesday on the differences between the movie and the plays we’ve read about this Kevin Sorbo-portrayed hero. Questions range from “What sort of things are emphasized as heroic in the Disney version of the myth?” to “Why do you think Disney has changed certain aspects of the myth or the mythical characters?”
Actually, I’m looking forward to the paper. Being subjected to watching a Disney film and wasting a Netflix on it? Not so great.
(I mean, really, except for their version of Robin Hood, has Disney done many good animated movies? Not particularly).
The Towerlight had a write-up of Hot Fuzz this week, but as an avid fan of Shaun of the Dead, I certainly didn’t need the paper’s write-up to know I wanted to see this film in theaters (Shaun of the Dead I waited for on DVD).
Unfortunatly, my work-packed weekend (both pizza-work and school-work) will preventing me from seeing it tonight, tomorrow, Sunday, or even Monday. So I’m planning on taking in a post-night-class screening at Hunt Valley’s Regal Theater for their 7:35pm showing of the film.
Geordi LaForge was always my favorite character on Star Trek: The Next Generation. Hard to remember now, but when that show premiered, Levar Burton was probably the biggest name actor on the cast, and he got cast as a jay-gee lieutenant who spent most of the first season pressing the “go to warp speed” button and looking at things with his electronic eyes. Anyway, the point is, that they cast him in the most neglected regular-character role of the ensemble cast.
Anyway, I was also at that time a huge fan of Reading Rainbow – that educational PBS show hosted by Burton that encouraged kids to read. Imagine my excitement as a child, then, when an episode of Reading Rainbow focused on Burton’s work on Trek. Anyway, I love YouTube … I can’t remember the last time I saw an episode of Reading Rainbow, much less that particular episode, but if you never saw it, or if you haven’t seen it in years and years and years, just look “after the break” …
