In my apartment, that is. And in my car. And in the tiled bathroom, it’s just a cheap red-thing I got at Target and I can’t seem to get some random cat litter stones out of it. Wait. That’s a rug in the bathroom. Whatever, the rest of my apartment has a carpet.
Anywaaaaaay …
So Geisha called me up this afternoon to see how well I was doing with my “apartment cleaning agenda.” Apparently, some many individuals have contacted her to find out if my apartment is as messy and dirty as I describe it. It’s true: I’m a slob. There are piles of dirty clothes and dirty dishes, stacks of books and tipped-over-stacks of DVDs. Cat poop is stacked to the ceiling, and I usually just pee in whatever corner I happen to face when the urge strikes me. I, on occasion, just rip random mailings to pieces and scatter them about.
Okay, that’s an exaggeration. I do change the litter box on a regular basis, although I probably could’ve bought that Jeep Wrangler by now if I wasn’t spending $30 a month on cat litter and giant bags of cat food. Holy wallet drain, Batman — although the cats do seem to appreciate my efforts.
So, yes, my apartment is a mess. It’s less of a mess as I write this tonight, ten minutes from the dryer buzzing to announce the completion of my last load of laundry and then jumping into the shower to have dinner at Patrick’s with Geisha (no, we’re not dating, we’re just friends, really). Anyway, my apartment? Yep — it enjoys a natural state as a wreck. Stacks of books and mail and DVDs and dirty dishes and dirty laundry. I’ve got a weird slob/neat-freak thing going on, and they don’t always cooperate with each other.
Now, I realize that a lot of people’ll probably be quick to chide me for living in such a slovenly manner, but please consider that for the last year (well, since September at any rate), I’ve been both a full-time college student and managed a fifty-plus hour workweek. Generally, when I’ve had a few minutes to myself, cleaning my apartment hasn’t been my priority. My list, in certainly no order of importance, might theoretically include: Masturbation/Rapid Rotation of my Netflix Queue To Ensure Bang for my Buck/Internet Surfing/Studying/Reading for Class/Reading for Fun/Laundry/Stalking Classmates over MySpace and Technorati
Geisha was quick to chide me when she called for my tendancy to reward five minutes of cleaning with forty-five minutes of internet surfing. Well, while I made sure to find time for some internet surfing, I’m happy to report I made considerable progress. I washed all the dishes — including the cats’ food and water bowls — and put them away. I’ve done four loads of laundry. The living room is done, as is the kitchen, the bathroom, and the den. The bedroom still needs a vacuuming — which requires moving the futon so I can get to the carpet underneath it — and I’ve used the dining room as a “staging area” for anything that needs to be sorted, replaced, or a home found for. So, while I’m not finished cleaning my apartment, most of the work is done.
Dusting Hogwarts will, of course, require an entire day of dedicated service.