The Night of the Living Hippies

The first concert I went to was in 1999. HFStival ’99. Live. Offspring. Mighty Mighty Bostones. Other bands, other people. Someone threw a water bottle and it clocked my friend Lisa in the head.

The second concert I went to was a few years later, at Merriweather Post: Live and Counting Crows. Parking was atrocious, but I had my Jeep and seem to remember I took a somewhat muddy alternate route to get out and my friends were laughing and clapping and saying “Go Snay!” I also almost died that night as on my way down, some idiot almost caused me to run off 695 at 65 mph.

Third concert I went to was last night. Bob Dylan, at Hershey, PA. Geisha took me.

Observations:

1. Don’t eat at the Wendy’s in Hershey, PA (“Dylan Purgatory”). Inefficient, mismanaged, unclean, and slow, are some of the kinder words I can think of to describe it. We were the fourth people in line. When we got our food — twenty-five minutes later — the line stretched out the door. I did bump into a guy I knew from my Roots of Rock & Roll class last semester, Peter. He has a distinctive hair-style: “I was like, that looks like Peter. Hey, Peter!” and he turned around and was like “Woah, dude!” And then we talked about Towson U.

2. That moving floor on the Chocolate World ride at Hershey makes you feel like you’re a drunk. Woah! Geisha and I bought no chocolate after leaving the ride, which was free, so we feel we beat the system (even our parking was free!)

3. I really enjoyed the view. We had seating in the grass. By “view”, I don’t mean of the stage, but rather, of the ‘fashion hippy’ in front of us, a tall blond chick with wavy hair and a brown dress who danced for most of the concert. She wore a thong, no underwear bra, and her boobs bounced. YAY!

4. Parking was really really really atrocious. The parking lot turned into a total “go nowhere” fest and we wound up re-parking and waiting forty minutes for the parking lot to thin out, then dodged around traffic and took the very convenient back way out that no one else seemed to know about.

5. The only songs I recognized were “All Along the Watchtower”, “Rolling Stone”, and one other whose name escapes me. Something about Lily, I think. He played for close to two hours. At a few points, I even stood up and clapped.

6. Hippies like me. After leaving the venue and trying to find the car, I said, “I don’t know where we are!” I meant in relation to the vehicle. The dude behind me called out “You’re in Hershey, man!”

7. I brought Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix with me. I was reading it on the way up, didn’t bring it into the concert, and continued to read it while waiting to escape parking lot hell. Why must the Ministry of Magic be so short sighted? Silly Ministry!

8. Thank you for taking me, Geisha.

addicted

I’m completely addicted to AstroEmpires.com (and clearly it’s impacting on my blogging). It’s like the board-game RISK, only in space, and you have to build up your planet’s resources and structures to ensure an adequate income flow before you can really begin a war campaign.

It’s completely free — just really addictive. New players get a seven-day grace period to build up their empires before more experienced players can attempt to conquor them. It’s a lot of fun, and totally real-time.

I’m a member of the [EGBT] guild — “Evil Inside”. My home world is New Timonium (I’m original) on the Ceti server at C25:56:40:13. I’d recommend you read this before you begin: “How to build 10 planets in 7 days.”

(No, Jamaila, this is not a paid post!)

Jury Duty News

It’s not looking good for future “This is what I did at Jury Duty” posts. I called the number I was instructed to on the notification sheet, and was informed to call back tomorrow at noon to find out if I should report at 1:30pm. To paraphrase, “But you probably won’t, because you’ll already be at your place of work.”

Okaaaaay. I’ll call back at noon, meanwhile, here’s hoping for a lazy day of resume submissions, laundry, and a few less chapters of Harry Potter & The Goblet of Fire then I’d be reading if I’d been told to report bright and sunshine early.

spoiled

I’m a little peeved.

I was aware that someone was claiming to have read the manuscript for the forthcoming final Harry Potter novel (it’s in the news), but I never figured reading the article would reveal that information. I avoided the article for the fear of being spoiled. In the end, it was my fault for clicking to read a blog title on the article that I was, in fact, spoiled — I never thought a blogger would either be that clueless, or that much of an asshole, to discuss the situation while at the same time posting the spoilers without so much as a warning. I mean, it’s possible to discuss the possibility of someone reading the book while not revealing the information he’s bragging about, right?

I don’t know who I’m more pissed at — me, for reading his blog, or him, for not exercising some common sense.

I won’t provide a link — I don’t want you to be a spoiled, too. But if you read Blogtimore.com, DO NOT click on “Below the Fold.”

Frankly, A Little Scary (now knock on wood)

I got home about 10:30ish Monday night. An hour later …

Armed robbery // A deliverywoman for Domino’s Pizza in the first block of Cranbrook Road was about to deliver food to the occupants of a dwelling in the first block of Quiet Stream Court about 11:30 p.m. Monday when she was robbed of $20 by two men, one armed with a handgun.

Not that I knew this happened until Geisha e-mailed this clip to me this morning, however.

I used to be an assistant manager at that Domino’s Pizza, years and years ago, when I was living in Towson. In fact, that store moved to Cranbrook Road from it’s old location in an industrial warehouse off Deereco (that old place had a serious rodent infection, I never ate food there because, seriously, it had a really bad rodent problem) and the day we opened the new location, I actually took the first delivery ever. I know, no one finds this as interesting as I do.

The scary thing, for me, is that I live on the first block of Quiet Stream Court. I mean, I don’t know that Quiet Stream can really be divided into blocks — it’s one long street that connects on one end to Cranbrook, and the other to Padonia. There are four branching streets. But, if you’re going to break it up into blocks, it makes sense I’m in the first one given my building number.

Knock on wood, I’ve never been robbed in way too many years of pizza delivery. The most trouble I’ve ever had at the Franchise (which is in fact, a Domino’s Pizza, located north of this corporate location) or the Indy (which does deliver to the Cranbrook area) is my fellow drivers and being stiffed. Of course, robbery is a risk of the job, just as much as traffic accidents and stiffing. Here’s hoping it never happens to me.

(Christ, how funny would it be to get robbed by my neighbors? “Hey, don’t you live in Apartment D? Hey, don’t you have that fucking dog? You better shoot me now, motherfucker, because if you don’t, I’m going into my apartment, getting my gun — .45, motherfucker! — and I’m going to fucking pop a cap into your ass and your dog’s ass!!!!”

Who am I kidding? I’d never give him advanced notice. “Um, hon, our next door neighbor is at the door and wants his money back that you robbed for him. By the way, his gun is a lot bigger than yours!”)

Seriously, though, there are some shady characters in the next building over. I don’t think they’d be stupid enough to rob anyone (if any of the residents were randomly questioned by the police about a lanky dude with a shaggy beard, everyone’d know who they meant and what building he was in), but you never know.

IDrive-E

I don’t think it’s a secret that, when it comes to computer related things, I’m a bit of a doof. “Defrag my computer … you mean, with a hand grenade?” But I’m not so computer unsavy that I don’t know it’s important to protect my needed files — music, word documents, photos — with IDrive-E, an industry leading consumer online backup service. IDrive-E is free up to two gigabytes, secure with a 256-bit AES, and fast (like, “Superman v Speeding Train” fast).

Their mission is to save the world … one computer at a time. I wonder if they know how much difficulty they’re going to have with me. I fear for their tech support guys. “Well, he knows it isn’t a cup holder, but that’s about all he’s got going for him…”

THIS IS A PAID POST.

The Boy Who Lived

I’ve been re-reading the Harry Potter books — all of them — in sequential order, to refresh myself prior to the release of the seventh and final book in the series next month. Last night, I worked 5-10 at the Indy and took my paperback copy of Goblet of Fire with me so I could start it (I finished Prisoner of Azkaban Monday). It was a slow night (I had seven runs) and I managed to get one hundred and twenty or so pages in.

So there I am, leaning against the front counter, reading the book, and in the background, Merv and Silent Bob have started a discussion about the merits of the Harry Potter series. “The first movie sucked,” Silent Bob said. “They keep breaking the rules and get rewarded at the end. What kind of message does that send?”

Yes: this same Silent Bob. These were the fragments of thoughts which entered my mind as I assembled my response in my brain:

1. Did you get fired for that time you lost track of time (drugged out of your skull) and woke up at a musical festival in the South an hour before you were supposed to be at work? And you couldn’t leave for home right away because a.) your keys had been stolen and you would’ve known about this sooner if you hadn’t been drugged out of your skull? And b.) you’d apparently, coked out of your mind, put your car up on concrete blocks and rolled the tires into a pond? (At least, that’s what I heard).

2. That time you went home with the customer’s pizza?

3. All that other shit you’ve done that you haven’t been fired for?

4. Because, really, it seems like you bend, break, and diddle the rules every chance you’ve get, and do I ever see you getting any punishment for it? I mean, working here might not be a reward, but it gets you enough cash so you can continue to be a coke-head.

However, before I could unleash my witty reply on his drug-numbed-and-adled brain, I-Chopped-My-Finger-Off-And-Don’t-Know-Why walked up front, heading out the door on a delivery. Seeing I was reading a book, he shouted “Hey, this isn’t a library! Why don’t you do some work?”

I hate ICMFOADKW. No, that’s not strong enough. I loathe ICMFOADKW. I loathe him more than anyone I’ve ever worked with — if you rolled Zebulon and Ogre into one person, tripled the level of their idiocy and retardness and mixed in a dash of Sloth, I would still prefer that person to ICMFOADKW. So, I abandoned my response to Silent Bob and shouted after ICMFOADKW: “Well no shit it isn’t a library — if it was a library I wouldn’t have had to bring a book with me, would I have? No, I could’ve fucking left it at home!”

Who the fuck is he to lecture someone about not doing work? Fuck, I had to do half his shit last night because he was fingering that ridiculous ring in his lip. I’m just hoping that Merv, who also dislikes ICMFOADKW (but who has a violent streak), goes through with his threat to “Rip that fucking thing off his face.”

“What, the ring?”

“Yeah, and his lips while I’m at it. Then I’m going to staple his fucking mouth shut.”

Just so long as I’m not around to mop up the blood.

Boy, I bet you thought this post was actually going to talk about Harry Potter, didn’t you?

Whoooops, Did I Blow Up Downtime Miami?

The unrated version of Reno 911! Miami The Movie was released on DVD this week (did I mention it’s an unrated DVD release?). The cops from Reno, Nevada, travel to Miami, Florida to attend a police convention. Evil terrorists disrupt the convention and the only ones standing between their evil goals and being thwarted are … Superman and Batman. Erm. No, the Reno 911! cops. Seriously, they’ve already won (or we should just let them win because it’d probably do less damage that way).

I went to the Reno 911! Miami The Movie DVD release page and played “Midnight Shootout” (one of four online games). You’re given a weapon and have a few seconds to see a scene — there are some good guys, some innocents, some cops, and some bad guys. Then you’re blindfolded and you have to open fire … while blindfolded. The good news is, I hit more bad guys then non-bad guys (I do feel bad about that clown, less so about the mime). For the last round, I was quite certain I was prepared for my target (I can hit a broad side of a building blindfolded with a rocket launcher, I’ve always told myself), and yet when it came to it, no, it would appear I am, in fact, single handedly responsible for the destruction of downtown Miami. That’s apparently good enough for the Reno 911! police force, because they offered me a spot on the team.

Make Me Puke

You might think it’d be the perfect drink for me, but I assure you, pizza beer would, in fact, make me puke.

His pizza beer started as a brewing experiment. He added tomatoes, oregano, garlic and basil to one batch and called the result Mamma Mia Pizza Beer.

But do you ask for a pint or a slice?

What – no mozzarella cheese?

But to be specific …


You Are a Ham Sandwich


You are quiet, understated, and a great comfort to all of your friends.
Over time, you have proven yourself as loyal and steadfast.
And you are by no means boring. You do well in any situation – from fancy to laid back.

Your best friend: The Turkey Sandwich

Your mortal enemy: The Grilled Cheese Sandwich

… my favorite sandwich is ham, but to be specific, it’s a ham sandwich with American cheese, mayo, mustard, a dab of jalapeano mustard, and perhaps a slice of lettuce. Served on the side? A pickle and chips. Mmmm mmmm mmmm.

HT: Violet.

BSG Viper Mark II … in Lego

A lot of the attempts at modeling Battlestar Galactica’s Mark II Colonial Viper that I see on Brickshelf are done in minifig-scale. As a result of that scale, the models almost all look clunky and, frankly, awful. Increasing the scale, however, seems to be what is needed to do the trick.

lego viper

SnipofSmeg’s Brickshelf gallery has been updated with his attempt at modeling a Viper Mark II in scale with a Lego technic figure. I think he did an amazing job, even capturing the down-turn of the fighter’s nose, the open equipment panels on the body, and the ship’s sleek shape. If I have one complaint, or request, it’s that he redo the photos — they’re blurry and out of focus and don’t do his build justice.