Doc Brown’s a pretty stupid guy, as intelligent as he is.

Okay, so I had a pretty dull Saturday night. Changed the cat litter, cooked some fish sticks, drank some cheap beer, sorted a few jars of coins and rolled them, and watched the Back to the Future trilogy. By the time I got to Part III, which seems pretty “out there” compared to the first two (which both feature 1955 rather prominently), something began to bother me.

It didn’t really click until I walked into the Bookstore this morning. I snapped my fingers and exclaimed, “Oh my!”

Okay, so, to bring everyone up to date:

At the end of Part II, Marty McFly is stuck in 1955 after 1985-era Doc Brown seemingly blows up after a lighting bolt strikes the Delorean. In reality, the Delorean was transported back in time to 1885. With a letter from the past as a guide, Marty and 1955-Doc Brown unearth the Delorean from its hiding place in an used mine, where 1985-Doc Brown hid it.

The car has a blown fuse for its time device, but 1985-Doc Brown includes instructions on how to build a replacement from 1955 parts. 1955-Doc Brown builds the replacement (it’s honking huge and takes up most of the hood), but instead of returning to 1985, Marty decides to go back to 1885: he and 1955-Doc Brown have learned that 1985-Doc Brown is shot and killed shortly after his arrival in 1885. Arriving in 1885 in a white-wall wheeled Delorean, Marty promptly rips a fuel line, this prompting an entire ridiculous (but fun) plot about getting a train up to 88 miles an hour, pushing the Delorean (outfitted with rail-car wheels) back to the future.

So: here’s my question. Presumably, by the time Marty arrives in 1885, Doc Brown has already hidden his Delorean in the abandoned mine shaft. Would it not have been far easier to remove the fuel line from this Delorean, and make a note to 1955-Doc Brown to just replace the thing? Obviously, I assume a replacement fuel line could be obtained in 1955, but if not, I’m sure 1985-era Doc Brown would be smart enough to instruct 1955-Doc Brown on how to build one.

And, y’know, failing all that: couldn’t 1985-Doc Brown have included a note to his 1955 self? Something along the lines of: “Hey, me, when you build that time machine car, here are some things you WILL ABSOLUTELY need replacements of: fuse, fuel lines …”