It’s funny, because earlier this week I was on Twitter, musing as to just how long it had been since I’d had a beer.

My best guess, if you’re interested, was probably Thanksgiving.

So then came yesterday night, and two back-to-back Happy Hours: the first was a post-work get together at The Barking Dog in downtown Bethesda. It was a fairly small turnout, but a few of the new folks came out, and a fun time was had by mostly all.

But especially by me, because hoo-boy am I a lightweight. So after having a few beers, I made my farewells and stumbled (safely) to the Metro station, where, after only a short wait, I boarded a train headed to downtown, and made my way to Vapianos in Golden Triangle for a DC Blogger happy hour, where I quite excitedly consumed several more drinks, went to the restroom a lot, made some new friends, met some old ones, went to the restroom a few more times, and finally, a bit after 11, made my excuses and stepped out for the trip home.

I checked my Next Bus on my iPhone, and voila! An L2 bus was approaching a nearby bus stop. So I hiked up to Dupont Circle, and around 11:20 (I guess), I was standing on New Hampshire, waiting for the northbound bus. There was a long line of traffic backed up, and I really didn’t give it too much thought …

… right up until some drunk crazy guy ran into the street and charged an SUV. I wasn’t quite sure what was going on, but the guy behind the wheel of the SUV used his door as a shield to shove the drunk guy away (who was screaming “I’m a lawyer! I’m a lawyer!”), and then jumped out of his car.

Which was hilarious because he hadn’t set the brake, so it started rolling backwards, and the woman in the passenger seat was like “HOLY SHIT WTF” as she was scrambling to get to the driver’s side to hit the brake. This was particularly hilarious because, if memory serves*, before hey husband/boyfriend/pimp/what-the-fuck-ever jumped out of the car, she’d been sort of “Mmm, sleep.” Hah! Shockingly, she managed to stop the SUV before it rolled backwards into the car behind it.

Meanwhile, Mr. I’m-Too-Cool-To-Set-My-Parking-Brake-Before-Kicking-Some-Drunk-Guy’s-Ass (pretty sure he must’ve been drinking) was busy wrestling with the aforementioned drunk “I’m a lawyer guy”, when some other dude ran up and started assailing the drunk guy, too.

Now, granted, assailed might be a strong word: it was clearly a physical confrontation, but I didn’t actually see any fists flying. You know how men will sometimes thrust out their chests and bump them with other men? Like that, but hostile. And cussing.

So I was just like, “Well, this isn’t going to make it easy to get aboard the L2″, (also, I didn’t want one of these drunk assholes to see me giving them the “WTF” look and punch me) and I just decided, “Fuck it, it’s cold, it’s icy, and I’m right at the entrance to the Dupont Metro Station — I’m going to walk home.”

So, y’know, it was cold, and there was ice, and I’d been drinking and drinking and drinking, so I walked home. And I got home safe! And in about 35 minutes, which is good on a non-winter/icy night, so, I guess the lesson is that I need to drink more often after work. At the very least, I’ll work off the beers.

*And, let’s be honest, six drinks? It probably isn’t.