Got Zombie?

Earlier today I endured great hardships in getting through the parking lot of Best Buy, getting through the crowds of Best Buy, and getting through the check-out lane of Best Buy. Why did I do this? To buy shiny round discs, including this one.

I’m not a fan of the horror genre, but ever since I saw the trailer last spring, I wanted to see this film. Why? It looked funny, and anylight-hearted look at zombies is probably going to be a good romp, especially when its British. The last British zombie film I saw was 28 Days, and, uh, ew.

Okay, so if one is to believe “Shaun of the Dead”, there is one really important lesson to learn. If your entire town becomes populated by zombies, and you hide out in a bar, 1.) make sure to stop at the gun-store and get a lot of firepower. But that wasn’t the real lesson, the real lesson is 2.) DO NOT STAND NEAR THE WINDOWS BECAUSE THE ZOMBIES WILL REACH IN DRAG YOU OUT AND DISEMBOWEL YOU AS EVERYONE WATCHES.

Also, that scene was very disgusting and I had to close my eyes. Do real people have that much bloody guts, or is it just for the prop dummy that the zombies ripped open?

Xander speak: “Sometimes I shouldn’t say words.”

Is it too late to mention that this rambling, disjointed post may or may not contain spoilers? Okay, ignore the latter – spoilers are a certainty. Also, taxes. Also, at Best Buy? Some old lady said I looked like Rodney Dangerfield. I wasn’t quite sure how to respond so I punched her in the face instead of trying.

There’s a lot to like about the film, but it isn’t over-the-top with the satire. Our hero is a 29-year old loser who likes hanging out with his best bud over the objections of his roomie and his girlfriend. After a particularly bad day at work, she breaks up with him and he becomes depressed. This helps to explain why on his daily commute to the convenience store, he doesn’t notice the dead bodies, the zombies, or the bloody hand-prints on the soda cooler’s glass door.

Well, eventually he and the best-bud find out, and wind up in the garden pitching LPs at some brain-dead supermarket worker who our hero shoves onto a drainage pipe, which promptly impales her. The gravity of the situation creeps in as she removes herself from the pipe, leaving a gaping hole (through which the camera frames his shocked expression as she lumbers forward) in her stomach.

This leads to a hilarious situation in which, like many great films — but for today’s purposes, we’ll just compare it to ‘Star Wars’ — our heroes embark on a (star?) trek to save their loved ones, along the way picking up a lot of annoying (but occasionally helpful) compatriots. Like David, who was not smart enough to brush up on the above mentioned rule #2. But he was smarmy and deserved it, and if I’d seen this in theaters, I’m sure the audience would’ve cheered, like that scene in “Empire Strikes Back” where a horde of horny uganaughts have their way with Threepio’s body parts as he screams, “Stop! Stop! Oh, R2-D — hey, that tickles — where ARE you?”

There are some touching moments in the film, I teared up as Shaun’s dying stepfather, Philip, confesses his love for Shaun, and his failings as a stepfather. Shaun, who has always previously refered to Philip as “not my real dad!” later tells his mother, “He was my real dad! For a moment, he was, but now he’s not – that thing, he’s not Philip, he’s not the man you loved, not anymore.” Because, of course, Philip died and then came back as a zombie. Surprise! I was wiping away tears as I shouted (much I’m sure to the enjoyment of my neighbors who were probably asleep by now), “BASH HIS ENGLISH-LOVING BRAIN OUT! BASH IT NOW!

There are of course the typical movie cliches. Remember the scene in Weird Science where the blonde kid is holding what he thinks is a water gun and he pulls the trigger and blows a hole in the wall? And of course the good guys show up at the last minute to save everyone with guns blazing.

Funny movie. Worth the rental or purchase. Don’t eat food during it. Disembowlment: yuck. Also, no sex scenes. Dammit.

0 thoughts on “Got Zombie?

  1. I’m terrified of zombies. Really, really terrified. It’s a miracle that I live on a street with a cemetary at the end of the block.

    But, I figure, it’s an older cemetary so most of the zombies that could come out of the ground, ala Night of The Living Dead, are going to be pretty dried out and fragile. I should be able to knock them to dust with a baseball bat.

    Additional fire power shouldn’t be a problem. I figure there are plenty of illegal guns in my neighborhood. The question is whether or not shorty got aim.

    It’s important to be ready for these things.