I kept telling myself, “You aren’t going to do this. Dude, you are up to your fucking neck in debt, don’t fucking do this.”
But then the nice big man put some papers down to me, and I signed my name once or twice, and I, uh, yeah.
I don’t really know what came over me. I was drooling over this rockin’ Jeep Sunday while driving up to Scranton. And Gary and I had been talking about Jeeps for the last two weeks – he’s pissed, bought the Unlimited (stretch Wrangler) close to a year ago, it was automatic only, then. Now its got a manual tranny, so he’s a little pissed. He was all, “You should buy a 6-cyl. Brand new, hooked up, 20k.” And I was all, “Oh, they’re twenty-five starting, easy.”
But, no, Gary – of course – has a buddy, same dude he bought the Unlimited from. The guy happened to stop in Tuesday. So I made some inquiries — “Not going to do it yet,” I told him repeatedly. “Not until November, earliest.” But he was eager, and nice, and a Jeep fan, and asked me questions – remember I did my credit score? “No problem,” he tells me. “Easy financing. You got two grand for a deposit?”
Sure, in savings. Um. Right, so I don’t have a savings account anymore? Well, I do, but my balance is like five bucks … after the cashier’s check for the downpayment and all.
You getting where I’m going with this?
I just bought an ’05 Jeep Wrangler, 6-speed, CD, fuck man, SILVER!!!!!! I mean, at once I’m all DUDE! and MORON! and DUDE! and MORON! I’m leaning more towards the moron side. I just spent two hours driving the fucking thing all over the place, and of course it was like damn thirty bucks to fill the tank back up. Oh, and plus? I fucking called out of work — at the last moment — to drive up to Bel Air (not even knowing if Gary’s pal was working) to see, hmm, maybe I can drive home with a Wrangler?
My payment is $327.85 a month. Thank GOD I don’t have my first payment due until mid May. Which is like the only fucking good news going on here … looks like I’m going back to working all day, every day … who needs down time, right? Right?
I feel fucking horrible. Plus, I have to get a ride back up to Bel Air to get my Celica. Because, see, I didn’t sell the car … HAH! I bought the Jeep as a SUNDAY DRIVER. To rarely drive. I spent twenty grand on a car I’m going to drive ONCE A FUCKING WEEK. I mean, who am I kidding, I’m going to drive it more than that, I’m just not going to use it for work, what with gas being fucking outrageous.
Oh, yeah, plus Andy? My insurance agent/former co-worker? Fuck man. I mean, its not a huge increase – not as much as I feared but daaaamn I am just fucked.
there woulda been more pictures but i didnt change the batteries after i got back from Scranton and I didn’t charge em either fuck i love that Jeep!
Is it possible to return cars? Because I heard their value like dropped 99% the second you drive them off the lot. I am in serious effin’ need of a debt consolidation loan. Or a bullet to the brain. Or someone to just step in and stop me from making these stupid fucking decisions!
(Oh! Oh! Plus? Dating someone – yeah, I know, I’m surprised too – and called her, and she was all, “where are you?” and I was all, “Uh, work?” and she believed me. If I’d told her I was buying a Jeep she woulda kicked my ass from Lauraville!!! eeep!!!!)
(Want a laugh? I once thought buying the first two seasons of the Dukes of Hazzard on DVD was a bad decision. Wake up, Jeff: that was $53 on credit card. Easy to pay off, if you just fucking concentrate once in an effin’ blue moon. TWENTY-K on a car when you’re already a shitload in debt? just double it, sure, smart plan, ass!)
Why am I such a fuck up?
(Tomorrow, I’m taking the top down and the doors off…aaaargh)
(anyone want to steal a jeep??? please????)